R.I.P 12/05/10

I quit smoking cigarettes. It's been 48 hours.

The die is cast.

There should be no turning back, not even to look back.

Like someone dear inside me is dying. You want to cry because it's sad. For 12 years, every single day, for almost 12 times on average.

and now we're on a "cool off" stage, - and might consequentially turn to a total BREAK UP. (the whole point)

It's as if i just lost a sweetheart.

But heck, i've successfully Quit on some other substance far worse- endured similar symptoms 20 times more intense than what the worst withdrawal from nicotine can bring, or so I thought.

I tell you, 'The Filth' days used to be- see me saying to myself everyday "i'm not going crazy" in 20 seconds intervals, that went on for years-and that's just the tip of the iceberg, mind you.

Now it goes like this - "Cigarettes are yucky" every time the urge kicks in, and the mind plays a trick.

Well you don't want to play with me-it's like playing against a pro, and getting beat to each and every punch.

this will be nostalgic. this will be fun.